So
most of the time an incident might be trivial, but if we do not
see it truly for what it is, it can be very dangerous. Fighting
ignorance is not like starting a war. It is simply opening our
eyes to notice the little things that, if not recognised, might
become problematic and dangerous for others and ourselves.
We
have a tendency to want everything right now. After hearing the
teachings, we think that we have the keys, but somehow they don't
fit. We may then turn away without considering our own efforts
and input. For example, as in the case of the splinter, even though
I knew that it would not get worse, it would still be painful
for some time. Thus we need to develop an attitude of being relaxed
while doing what is necessary. It may take time, but improvement
will gradually come. The danger here is the tension we experience
while waiting for a result. In fact, such anxiety actually slows
or blocks the improvement. Whatever we do, it is done better in
a relaxed way. If we rush, it will take longer.
During
our attempt to decrease our suffering, we must not exclude other
people. They are essential to our success because through them
we build up our strength of awareness. When we meditate, we have
a clearer mind, but when we come out of our practice and face
others, we find that we have not improved that much. Meditation
makes us more sensitive to others around us. When we are alone,
there is no problem, but when facing other people, our emotions
will surface. It is in our experiences with other people that
we find fuel for improvement. If we want to have enduring results,
we have to strike a balance between being with others and our
solitude. The attitude to develop is a reasonable balance of reaction
and acceptance. There is no pre-established standard. Through
our interaction with other people we will improve, but each of
us has to find our own limits.
The
key is to be aware so that we can see things clearly and dispense
with any preconceived points of view which only cloud perception.
We want to recognise what is really taking place. Every time we
look, we find "ego grasping." It is the first movement
of our consciousness. We all have this first reaction of, "I
perceive." At the base of any experience is ego grasping
which is the root of suffering. When we discover this ego grasping
there is a tendency to fight it. The point is not to fight it
but to recognise it, directly or indirectly perceiving it: I want,"
which is desire, or, "I don't want," showing our aversion,
or, I don't care," our ignorance. All the emotions are due
to ego grasping, a dualistic mode of perception, "I"
and "others." It produces much suffering yet we cannot
get rid of it by waving a magic wand. It is interesting to look
at the ego grasping in any experience, and to start working with
it.
The
term, -disturbing emotions" is merely a label. In fact, when
we do examine these emotions, we will see mental events, images,
sensations, etc. and not know to what they correspond. Take, for
example, the study of botany. We first gain understanding of the
connection between flowers and fruits, how they grow, and the
sequence corresponding to the seasons. In the same way, we first
gain awareness and then understanding of the "disturbing
emotions" and "ego grasping." Generally, we only
investigate or question ourselves when something has gone wrong
or we are not happy. When we are happy, we don't do anything.
At the base of our consciousness, there is the ego grasping, "What
I like, what I don't like, I don't care, etc." The more we
know about ourselves, the better our chance of liking and accepting
ourselves. Ego grasping is also the root of pride, jealousy, and
the other disturbing emotions. Slowly and gradually we will realise
that ego grasping pervades all of our experience. We will see
our jealousy and pride. In the example of botany, this is like
seeing the seed or the sprout. If we want to get rid of the plant,
it is easier to get rid of the sprout.
>>>
